Or do they?

The crescent moon symbol of Islam, the star of David symbol of Judaism, and the cross symbol of Christianity on the side of a brown, mud wall.
The crescent moon symbol of Islam, the star of David symbol of Judaism, and the cross symbol of Christianity on the side of a brown, mud wall.
Photo by Noah Holm on Unsplash

You read the title of this article, and I’m sure you’ve already formed an answer in your mind. Maybe you’ve followed some of my writings and are curious about what I think regarding this question.

Well, I’m afraid you’re going to keep waiting. I do have a thought on it, but I’d like to see if you can figure out what my opinion is on the matter as you continue to read. It will be implied.

This question doesn’t come up very often in my circle of Christian friends, but it rears its head now and then.

Oh, I am…


You want to like your kids too — but it doesn’t happen automatically

Photo by Lacie Slezak on Unsplash

You’ve seen them. You know them.

They are screaming toddlers in stores; they don’t give up their seats to the elderly; they talk back rudely, and they are selfish and inconsiderate.

Who are they?

They are kids you don’t like. They come in every age, race, gender, and size. Every time you see them or interact with them, you’d like to take them outside and whip some sense into them. A stern talking to wouldn’t cut it. They need some form of punishment, something that will help them see the error of their ways.

It’s not their fault. No kid…


You don’t have all the time in the world

Photo by Ransford Quaye on Unsplash

Being a father has been the greatest duty of my life. Raising my children into people that other people like because of who they are makes me proud. My wife and I did a great job.

They are 25, 23, and 21 years old now and each is living a productive life. We have a two-year-old grandson as well who is the apple of our eyes.

I don’t often look back on the time the kids were home. I realize the folly of doing that. What can you change, right? …


And miss out on the most rewarding part of marriage

Photo by Simone van der Koelen on Unsplash

You know them. These are the healthy couples that have made a decision to not start a family. They’ve had their vasectomies and hysterectomies and gone through all the hoops to ensure that they don’t have any children.

They have money, holiday homes, monthly trips, three cars, and freedom to enjoy it. They look happy and it looks like they really do have it all, filling you with envy.

Or they don’t. They’re a middle-class couple, making a nominal income, with regular financial decisions like most of us.

In my discussions with married couples that don’t have kids or single…


Girls can be scary for a young father

a black man or father looks at his baby daughter sleeping
a black man or father looks at his baby daughter sleeping
Photo by Nubelson Fernandes on Unsplash

When I thought about having children, I wanted boys.

Let me rephrase. I wanted more boys than girls. Or I wanted boys more than I wanted girls.

If my wife and I had begun our family with two girls, we would have tried until a boy arrived. Actually, that’s exactly what happened. My point is that not having a boy was not an option. Not having a girl was.

This is what I thought:

  • You don’t have to worry about them as much.
  • They also will continue my family name. The legacy of my name was very important to me.

Fiction

You’ll see it if you obey Jesus’ commands

an outstretched arm reaching toward a distant sun setting in the horizon
an outstretched arm reaching toward a distant sun setting in the horizon
Photo by Marc-Olivier Jodoin on Unsplash

“Lord, what are you doing out there? The world is a mess. It looks like you are totally absent. Are you?”

40-year-old Khaya was watching the news as she did every evening and was feeling despondent at the events that were being reported. Humanity seemed to be devolving into a loveless, violent, and godless creation and she saw it in the burning of businesses and churches; the daylight, brazen shootings of others; the violent intolerance of differing viewpoints; the lack of anything on mainstream TV that she feels comfortable watching, and on and on.

“You’re not paying attention.”

It wasn’t…


A poem- Inspired by I am the good shepherd John 10: 11–15

a dad walking hand-in-hand with his son along a beach with waves crashing the shoreline.
a dad walking hand-in-hand with his son along a beach with waves crashing the shoreline.
Photo by Szilvia Basso on Unsplash

I am the good daddy
When trouble comes I’m there
I have so much love to spare
My chamber will never run bare

I am the good daddy
I would lay down my life for you
When you stray I won’t tire to pursue
And to cling to you like glue

I am the good daddy
I speak good things, you know my voice
My word to you is the better choice
Filtering out the deceiving noise

I am the good daddy
The wolf comes I stand at the door
The serpent spits I strike at the floor
The armies advance, I go…


One thing is that I didn’t graduate

Photo by Ken Theimer on Unsplash

I went to university for four years. It was the most fun I had had up to that point.

That was the problem. It was all play and no work.

At frosh week, which was a week for freshmen to acclimatize themselves to university life, the chancellor gave a speech in which he stated that there were some of us who would not graduate.

I purposed that I would not be one of them.

My family had immigrated to Canada from Kenya with the very purpose of ensuring that we had a good higher education. At that time, in 1985…


You might change someone’s mind that way

Photo by Patrick Fore on Unsplash

I recently wrote an article titled ‘How To Raise Children That Other People Like.’

In it, I wrote,

‘Delayed obedience was disobedience. We spanked early. It was usually a couple of fingers to the hand or the bum. I believe the last time any of our kids got spanked was when they were about 5-years-old.

This made some of my readers uncomfortable. Some did not agree with my parenting methods. One wrote,

‘no child should be spanked. Ever. Full stop. There is absolutely NO situation where it is warranted. It’s not a form of discipline, it’s an intimidation and fear…


Fiction

It doesn’t stop them from going on vacation.

Photo by Robson Hatsukami Morgan on Unsplash

Fred and Tina were taking their daily evening walk through Woodland cemetery when the silence was broken by a dog's whimper. They saw a German Shepherd lying by a gravestone. Inscribed on the gravestone was the death of two people.

On the left, it read Frederick Daley, Dec 26,1945-June 16, 2021
On the right, it read Christina Daley, May 28, 1945-June 16, 2021

“Fred,” Tina said, gasping.
“I can read, Tina,” said Fred, just as shocked.

The names were theirs and the dates of birth were correct. That wasn’t the only reason the inscription paralyzed them. …

Vuyo Ngcakani

writer, husband for 25 years, father of 3, grandfather of 1

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